Secrets to Longevity

Hoping for a long life?

Check with Neo-Neocon for an informative essay on the topic, "Want to reach 100? Just do whatever you want…":

…and hope for the best.

HAT TIP: Instapundit.

Back From Etnies

This photo's not so focused, and I didn't take any others, since I couldn't get a good vantage point. I'm standing up on the planter as it is.

I'm going to look into getting my own skateboard this week. I need to see how the summer funds are holding out. I'm not paid until September 1st, a couple of weeks after the semester begins (and we're taking the boys to Las Vegas for LOVE next weekend). So it's either a new board this week or hold off a bit, although I'm getting the bug to go skating again. Being with my young son all the time is getting me fired up. I've been enjoying seeing the thrills of skateboarding through the experience of my boy. It's an old saying but it occurred to me today it's true, when my son came up to where I was sitting, after a couple hours of skating, and said, "I want to come back tomorrow!" I told him sure, and I thought what am I waiting for on my own skating? You're only young once!



RELATED: Check the Etnies Skatepark homepage. There's going to be a grand opening for the expansion on August 20th.

August Birthdays

My mom turned seventy-five earlier this week. President Obama turned fifty on Thursday. And Lucille Ball would have turned 100 yesterday.

My youngest boy's going to be 10 years-old next week, but we had a little cake and ice cream party for him earlier. A few of his friends from school came over. They opened presents and played video games (the streamers are still up at top below, and not too messy). And then yesterday I took my boy down to my friend Mikey Hirsch's skateboard pro shop, So Cal Skateboards. I got him a Nijah Huston street skate for his birthday, seen at bottom. Nijah won the street Gold Medal at the X-Games last week, and my son digs him.

Big Day at U.S. Open of Surfing!

Well, we're back.

I hung out with my youngest son while my oldest tooled around Huntington Beach with some friends from school.

We parked at 12th Street and Pacific Coast Highway, just North of the Sun'n Sands Motel:

Here's the scene looking toward the pier from the BMX grandstands. Vendor booths are under the tents. The Skullcandy sound booth is at right:

Actually, I didn't have time to watch surfing. I usually do, but I couldn't leave my youngest kid alone. But Los Angeles Times has a surfing report, "Brett Simpson is eliminated at Nike U.S. Open of Surfing":

So we mostly hung out by the skateboard ramps:

The weather was awesome. Good for a couple of Pacíficos:

Hundreds of thousands of fans visit the U.S. Open every summer. It's mostly young people, guys with board shorts and girls in bikinis. One thing I found interesting is how people write on themselves, with erasable ink, I guess. Mostly these are good-natured messages, like "Free Hugs Here," seen on a lot of the young guys. That said, I saw one hot little number in a bikini with a slashed line running from her bikini top to her bottoms, with an arrow pointing to her private area with the message, "INSERT HERE!" Well, I'm all for truth in advertising! And honestly, some people have no problem writing "F- Me" all over their bodies. I asked my oldest son about that and even he was surprised. He then showed me his Skullcandy tatoo, so what can you do:

Heckuva lot better than "F- Me", that's for sure!

On Making Love and Having Sex

From David Solway, at Pajamas Media (via Instapundit):

Today there is no doubt that we tend compulsively to think in terms of object, function, or mechanism whenever we consider the incalculably human. Love is something to be “worked at” like a problem in mathematics that must be solved for the sake of its practical application. Friendship is called a “support system.” A Pascalian terror before the cold immensity of the universe is excessive “stress,” as if one were absorbing too much force for the mental “structure” to distribute and resolve successfully. For post-structuralists, a novel or a poem is only the manifestation of an “abstract model.” Wisdom is a kind of “flexible adaptability.” Desire is libidinal “tension” which must be “discharged.” And what was once called “making love,” an expression that however glibly it was employed still retained the implication of a genetic mystery, is today airily dismissed as “having sex,” a phrase which seems to concede in the direction of honesty but really betrays our attitude of therapeutic mechanism — like having an enema, a check-up, or an operation. Sex is an excellent way of running the machine.

Israel Leading the Way in In Vitro Fertilization

At New York Times, "Where Families Are Prized, Help Is Free":

TEL AVIV, Israel — Jewish and Arab, straight and gay, secular and religious, the patients who come to Assuta Hospital in Tel Aviv every day are united by a single hope: that medical science will bring them a baby.

Israel is the world capital of in vitro fertilization and the hospital, which performs about 7,000 of the procedures each year, is one of the busiest fertilization clinics in the world.

Unlike countries where couples can go broke trying to conceive with the assistance of costly medical technology, Israel provides free, unlimited IVF procedures for up to two “take-home babies” until a woman is 45. The policy has made Israelis the highest per capita users of the procedure in the world.

“It’s amazing when you think about it,” marveled Keren, 35, who asked to be identified only by her first name. She was seated in a waiting room at Assuta’s in vitro fertilization clinic, a beige canister of her husband’s frozen sperm at her feet. The sperm had been delivered from another hospital where she had her first IVF attempt three years ago, resulting in the birth of her daughter.

“I want at least three kids, and if we had to pay so much money I’m not sure we would be able to do this,” she said.

RTWT.

I love how non-discriminatory the program is. Definitely goes against the "evil" Israel meme. Shoot, progressives ought to be loving a policy like this. Sheesh.

Ritual Mourning for Leiby Kletzky

At New York Times, "Ritual Mourning for Slain Brooklyn 8-Year-Old."

Throughout the morning and afternoon on Friday, a stream of visitors entered the Kletzky family’s brick apartment building on 15th Avenue in Borough Park. Almost all were somber, as if on a mission they did not relish.

Shoeless and sitting on a low chair, Leiby’s father, Nachman, received the visitors alone in a narrow dining room while his wife, Itta, and their four daughters clustered in a bedroom off the kitchen.

Around the apartment, there were so many gifts of fruit and cakes that the family had been forced to send some back. But these were no consolation, visitors said.

“They’re trying to cope,” said Jonathan Schwartz, 42, a close friend. “They keep on saying that God gave them the privilege to raise this child for nine years.”

Though most visitors had attended shivas before, several observed that no gathering had approached the shock and deep grief of Leiby’s.

“If you had a dad go, 90 years old, it’s understandable,” said one family friend, who asked that his name not be used. “This is harder to comprehend, the worst of the worst.”

Update: After Leiby Kletzky Murder

A follow-up to "Reassessment After Leiby Kletzky Murder."

From Neo-Neocon, at Pajamas Media, "In Kletzky Killing’s Wake, We Can’t Lock Up Our Kids."

Great essay. Very reasonable. But again, I'm not sure reason returns very quickly after something so shocking. I don't think folks need to "lock up" their kids. I think we should all be more careful. That mother in Pico Rivera let her child, 6-years-old, go the restroom alone in a public park. My wife spoke about it at the time as something we'd never do. Rape is unconscionable, but the child is alive. Eight-year-old Leiby's forever gone from this world. His mother is gripped with guilt. I feel bad for her. I don't think she made a mistake. She's the mother. She would know her own child's ability. But as I noted already, my youngest boy wouldn't be ready for a 7-block walk all alone. It's not like he'd have a problem walking home. It's that he'd be distracted somehow and lose focus on the mission. He'd dawdle perhaps. He'd get absent-minded. He's got attention deficits. I don't know. But we're not at the trusting stage yet. Call me overprotective. That's fine. My son's well-adjusted and safely snug in his bed. But each child is different. My older son has all kinds of autonomy. But we still worry sometimes.

God bless the Kletzky family. I hope they're coping well. It's so sad.

Pat Austin has some comments on the case as well.

See also New York Daily News, "Leiby Kletzky died fighting for life: Confessed killer Levi Aron has marks indicating a 'struggle'."

VIDEO: Leiby Kletzky Funeral

Via New York Daily News:

Also at NYDN: "Butcher of Brooklyn Levi Aron admits how he killed 8-year-old Leiby Kletzky in chilling confession."

PREVIOUSLY:

* "Reassessment After Leiby Kletzky Murder."

* "Levi Aron Charged in Kletzky Murder Case."

* "Leiby Kletzky."

Reassessment After Leiby Kletzky Murder

I'm upset by the murder of Leiby Kletzky.

We've had an empty nest all week. Our boys have been visiting relatives in Fresno. They'll be back today, but we've missed them. Sure, the downtime from the kids has been nice. The house is clean as a whistle. We had an open house on Sunday. My wife and I detailed everything. Here's the kitchen yesterday afternoon. A few items on the counter, but there's no usual mess from a full day of family cooking and hanging out, with clothes and toys strewn all about:

My wife hadn't heard of Leiby's death. I mentioned it to her when we went out last night to Yogurt Land. She reminded me of the report over the 4th of July weekend of the 6-year-old boy who was allegedly raped after his mother let him use the restroom alone at Rio Hondo Park in Pico Rivera. It looks like a nice park. No doubt the mom felt safe. In Brooklyn, families have to be asking questions, so many questions. As the New York Times reported earlier:

Suddenly, an Orthodox Jewish community that had blanketed streets and subway stations with missing-child posters, that had promised a six-figure reward, had to face the devastating reality: Leiby was dead, and the suspect was also Jewish, living not far away. His death also forced parents, not just in Borough Park but across the city, to wonder, to speculate, to second-guess themselves: Was it one of those headline-grabbing tragedies that could have been avoided? When is a child ready to go it alone, anyway?

My wife and I agree that our youngest son, who's almost 10, is nowhere near ready to "go it alone," so to speak. And my wife worries about our high-schooler, who walks by himself to and from school. We live in the Irvine Unified School District, and it's safe here. But no need to get a false sense of security. No one can predict when a crime might take place, and when one does people ask, "How could this have happened"? Well, yeah. How? But it's too late by then. The Wall Street Journal had something on this yesterday, "After Leiby Kletzky Murder, Urging Parents to Keep Calm." It's an interview with Hara Estroff Marano of Psychology Today. I can't imagine how this is reassuring:

The Wall Street Journal: Most parents’ first reaction to a story like this is to reassess–and in many cases, ratchet back–the independence they give their kids. What should be guiding their thinking right now?

Hara Estroff Marano: The very fact that this is such a rare event should get some consideration in their mind. One reason people are talking about it is because it’s so strikingly unusual. It’s within a particular community… this is a very insolated incident. I don’t know there are really lessons for outsiders here at all, because we don’t yet know all the details. So any reassessment should focus on the rarity of the event. This is just not something that’s likely to happen very often.

The first reaction is ‘oh my god I can’t let my kid walk down the street.’ No, look at the situation. Instead of saying ‘no you can’t cross the street,’ you say, ‘here, I’ll watch you cross the street’ and watch them a few times, then let them do it alone.

Keep reading.

It's sounds so logical and reasonable. Whereas fears and love aren't. I think parents need to go with their instincts, especially if they've got young kids. A couple more years of hovering ain't gonna harm a child. Frankly, in this day and age, I think families let kids off the leash a bit too early anyway.

Pechanga Getaway

I'm with my family at Pechanga Resort.

Here's the view from my room, Northeast, earlier today, about 6:00pm. Beautiful:

And speaking of rooms with a view, have you been reading Andrew Sullivan? I haven't, but since E.D. Kain's been featured here recently, my web surfing's taken over me over to RAWMUSCLEGLUTES' page, at The Daily Beast. (And his latest "View From Your Window.")

Pew Research Center: Fathers and the Modern American Family

See: "A Tale of Two Fathers: More Are Active, but More Are Absent."

If readers can remember back to 2008, one of things I'd hoped about Barack Obama, if he were elected, is that he'd help restore stable family values to the black community. He has not. While President Obama is a model family man, he's rarely spoken out in any direct, sustained way that would bring his moral authority to bear on the cultural pathologies of the race. He needs to be out speaking like this, often, and sincerely, like Father's Day comes more than once a year.

According to Pew, "... more than one-in-four fathers with children 18 or younger now live apart from their children ..."

And especially:

Fathers’ living arrangements are strongly correlated with race, ethnicity and socioeconomic status as measured by educational attainment. Black fathers are more than twice as likely as white fathers to live apart from their children (44% vs. 21%), while Hispanic fathers fall in the middle (35%). Among fathers who never completed high school, 40% live apart from their children. This compares with only 7% of fathers who graduated from college.

This is not to dismiss other ethnic groupings, for example, the Hispanic population, but I once taught Black Politics, and I continue to see the poorest academic and social performance of young black men than any other other demographic. I used to be sympathetic, if not a little sad about it. Now I just get mad, and if I can, I'll get in your face if you're not performing up to standards. Of course, I'm only a professor, so my role is limited, but if I can model some achievement or direction, that will count for a bit. It's not just a problem on television or in the movies. I see it up close. I personally grieve. Perhaps I can do more later, when I have some changes in my own family. Time. Time to give back.

Now, closer to home, I'm not teaching this summer, and so I'll have the next two months to spend with my family, for some quality time and recreation. No big trips are planned. My youngest son will be the challenge while school's out, though. He needs to be active and needs a lot of direction. Just last week I was taking him skateboarding two times a day, but we'll need to read and study as well. My older son is going on 10th grade and he's very independent. He's got a young lady friend (kinda girlfriend) who he spends most of his time with, and he doesn't like me tagging along too much. But I need to get on him to do more chores around the house, and hopefully I can get him to do some reading instead of downloading music all the time.

At the Pew study it notes that 63 percent of dad's today say that being a father is harder now than it was a generation ago. And, "Only about one-in-four adults say fathers today are doing a better job as parents than their own fathers did." Yeah. Okay. But what's the measurement? If it's economically, things have been pretty spotty these last few years, and we'd have to go back two or three generations to find a time when there was less economic dynamism (and dislocation). But culturally, the dads of today are way more hands-on than when I was a kid, and that's good. My dad was perhaps more involved than some other fathers in my neighborhood growing up, but he was just as emotionally distant as any I can think of. I never wanted to be a father like that, and thank goodness. Sure, there's more we can do, as men and fathers, and no one measures up perfectly to their own expectations and those of their children. But keeping it all together is the primary responsibility, and giving equal support to the spouse so everyone can grow and be happy. In that way men have a greater responsibility as parents than in earlier generations. I think when we have a booming economy again, some of the load will ease, and successful fatherhood might increase (increased togetherness, less family breakdown).

Anyway, at top, I'm taking a break from cleaning house yesterday morning. We have a realtor. He showed the house at 10:00am and my wife and I were both up detailing everything. My youngest boy slept until about 9:00am, and my oldest is out of town until later today. I might shave. I've just been chillin' since school got out at the end of May.

More later.

Have a good Father's Day everyone.

More Parents Buying Apartments for Their Children

This is an amazing story, a testament to Americans' financial resilience amid the Obama Depression.

At New York Times, "The Gift Apartment From Mom and Dad":

FOR some parents, an engraved pen set just won’t cut it as a graduation present. It seems so insubstantial, so unoriginal. Anyway, the kid will just lose it. So how about a New York apartment?

Real estate brokers say that in the last year, they have seen more parents shopping for apartments for their grown children, hoping to take advantage of low mortgage rates and apartment prices that are still about 20 percent down from the market’s peak.

“I got a digital watch for graduation,” said Barry Silverman, an executive vice president of Halstead Property, “but I’ve worked with families where the children are getting an apartment.”

These congratulatory apartments are often studios or small one-bedrooms, but on occasion they are bigger-ticket items, he said, because “the parents see it as a long-term investment and a good place to park their money.”

In many cases, brokers say, the parents do not live in the New York area and view the apartment as a potential pied-à-terre for themselves when the child decides to move on. Some buy it as a straight-out gift, a gesture of profound affection sweetened by the current generous tax exclusion. Others buy it as an investment and retain ownership, and still others acquire it through a family trust for joint ownership.

These purchases raise a number of financial and estate planning questions, and lawyers and building managers advise parents to structure the arrangement carefully.

That's for sure. Check that link at top for the rest.

Oh, Pretty Baby...

I know this is a romantic song, but when it comes on the radio it reminds me of my whole family. Love your loved ones. My wife and children are miracles to me. I can't take my eyes off of them. They're too good to be true ...

Ashton Sweet Memorial Service

The story made the front-page of this morning's Orange County Register, "1,000 attend funeral for Ashton Sweet." And also the second section at Los Angeles Times, "About 300 gather to celebrate life of Irvine teen Ashton Sweet." I don't know where the Times got that figure. There were well over 300 people, if not quite 1000. And the local media turnout was huge. See KABC-TV Los Angeles, "Loved ones remember Irvine teen Ashton Sweet at funeral service." My wife spoke to Michael Ghaemi, the driver. He said he could never forgive himself for what happened. My wife gave him a hug. And from the Register's report:

Michael Ghaemi, who was driving the car carrying Sweet and three friends when the crash took place, described "slow-motion flashbacks" with scenes of glass shattering, teenage girls screaming and a prayer he said to himself that none of them would be harmed.

Seconds after the wreck, Ghaemi said, "I knew that my wish was not granted."

Ashton's mother was forever grateful for the love everyone shared with her. Her daughter was loved in the community. Too soon an angel.

Shopping at Wal-Mart

Out with the family, yesterday morning:

This is the Wal-Mart in Foothill Ranch. It's beautiful out there. That's Saddleback Mountain seen from the parking at the second picture below:

Turns out that Wal-Mart had its annual meeting on Friday, "Wal-Mart CEO pushes plan to keep retailer growing." And it announced a huge $15 billion stock buy-back: "Wal-Mart to Buy Back Billions More in Shares."

Cruising around the toy section:

I love Wal-Mart. Great selection of products, and of course great prices. And environmentally friendly? "Wal-Mart's motive is no secret: Going green saves it money." Well, better late than never, I guess.

Okay, here's the kid's Holy Grail, the Beyblades:

I wrote about Beyblades last November. They're still popular.

And it's back to the skatepark later today!

Vans Skatepark — The Block in Orange

I was out most of the day yesterday with my son, pictured with the red shorts and white t-shirt:

The skatepark hosted a Thrasher Magazine/Pro-Tec skate jam last weekend, "Pro-Tec Pool Party (Masters) 2011." Also, "Highlights From the 2011 Pro-Tec Pool Party." I don't see mention of Tony Alva at the links, although he's on the wall up in the visitors' gallery:

Also, a poster with the combi-pool pictured. It's a replica of the Upland Skatepark's original combi from the late 1970s:

I'm amazed at the memories I have when visiting the skateparks. And it's weird to think I'm taking my own kid to skate, and he's just as obsessed with it as I was when I was his age. We're going again today.

Proposed Santa Monica Ballot Measure Could Ban Circumcision

My wife hadn't heard of the San Francisco ballot measure to ban the practice, so when we were watching the news last night she had to laugh: "So next we'll be having back-alley circumcisions?" Well, yeah. And she continued: "No grown man remembers being circumcised as a baby, but an 18 year-old will never forget." Ouch.

At KABC-TV Los Angeles, "Santa Monica Ballot Measure Wants to Ban Circumcision."

Rock Bottom

Read Neptunus Lex, "The Elephant in the Room" (via Dan Collins). Say a prayer and count your blessings as well.